A Touch of Moonlight (A Court of Moonlight Book 1) Page 16

  “I wish you didn’t need to.”

  “I know it’s just…” He sighed as he sorted Rina’s emotions out of his own, and he realized he needed to tell Arlen. “I can feel Rina’s emotions, even through Dorn’s block. It’s not as strong when he’s blocking her, but even now I can feel her turmoil and her guilt. What does she even have to feel guilty about? Arlen, I just want to help her.”

  The sleepy fae turned to face him and looked him up and down in that appraising way of his that made Fen want to squirm. “I’ll talk to Dorn about letting you help with teaching her to read, but you have to promise not to push her for answers about her past. If she tells you, she tells you, but it can’t be because you pressed the topic. I know you wouldn’t intentionally do anything to hurt her, but a new mating bond can make you do stupid things.” Arlen glanced in the direction Rina and Dorn had gone, their scents paving a path toward the woods. “If you’re going to be around her, since you can feel her emotions, I need you to tell me if she’s spiraling.”

  “Spiraling?” Fen asked.

  “She…” Arlen sighed through his nose, in that way he always did when he debated something. “She was contemplating killing herself when we met, and I’m afraid that the head injury and all of this could make her consider that again. I’d like to think she would turn to us for help, but… I know what it’s like to be in that place. You don’t think that you’re worth asking for help when you slip that far.”

  Fen’s heart dropped, not just for Rina, but for the way Arlen’s voice shook as he admitted just how far he himself had once fallen. “Arlen, I— yes, of course I’ll tell you. Does Father know?”

  “Yes, that’s part of why he’s been pushing everyone to give her space, but sometimes space isn’t what someone needs.”

  Fen nodded. He really was out of his depths with this and his Father had known he would be. He didn’t even know what to say to Arlen, let alone Rina. Maybe that was why Rina had connected with Arlen so easily, their mutual loss and pain giving them an added sense of kinship. And Dorn had been there for Arlen through it all, his abilities and history gave him insight that even Fen didn’t have. His Father was right, Dorn and Arlen were who she needed right now, not him.

  “Just let me know if there’s anything I can do, anything that you need.” Fen turned and headed for the garden.

  Sinking down against a tree where he could watch for Rina’s return, he unrolled the scroll. It was unusually short for a prophecy and he wondered if his father had given him an abbreviated copy. He read it twice, then slower for a third time.

  There will come a day when the royal line will die out and no soul shall sit upon the throne. It is in this time when great shifts will come about in the world. Lords old and young shall rise and fall.

  A queen of light itself shall be born to a human home. Her road shall be long and painful, paved in the blood of those she loves. Yet she shall love with a heart of gold and burn with a fire hotter than the sun.

  Her mate shall sing songs of sweet darkness greater than that of the burning stars. His magic will run brighter and deeper than all those before him.

  Courts shall fall before them and war shall rage in their wake. The world shall tremble beneath her power and that of her fated mate, and the world shall be made anew in the wake of their union.

  Fen held the scroll up to the sun, checking that there wasn’t more hidden in the paper. There was nothing more to be seen, so he folded the copy up and shoved it in his pocket. He’d hoped to find some line that he could point to that would prove it wasn’t them, but the prophecy was too short to argue.

  28

  Arlen

  Arlen watched Fen go before heading for Farin’s study. Just because he and Rina needed time to sort through things, didn’t mean he should disappear, too. He found Farin sitting at a round table, a map inlaid into its surface. Papers were stacked around him and Arlen took a moment to take in the room before settling down to help. One wall was lined with shelves of books and scrolls, whereas the one at the far end of the room housed a window and a worn chair and desk. The seat’s leather sagged where padding had once filled it. Alren made a mental note to get Farin a new one for winter solstice. The small couch and chairs in the middle of the room weren’t much better either, and there was a bare spot worn in the rug between them. Perhaps he should plan with the others to replace more than just the chair.

  Farin blindly slid a stack of papers across the map to him as he moved one of the pawns that noted the Fire Court’s focus. Sighing, Arlen sat and began the tedious work of sorting through messages to pick out the important bits. Somehow, he ended up with the stack from their own court, many of them asking for help with petty stuff.

  “Is this really what we should be doing?”

  Farin nodded. “We’re waiting on Rina and Fen. Besides, this stuff doesn’t do itself.”

  Arlen groaned and got to work. He’d much rather gather messages all day than respond to them. Pulling a piece of paper to himself, he began writing a request for more information from a village leader who needed assistance due to a storm damaging their supplies. Why they seldom included specifics when they asked was beyond him.

  He was on his sixth or seventh letter when someone cleared their throat. Glancing up, he found his mate in the doorway. Fen was already halfway to the table as Rina took in the room. When her gaze landed on the map buried beneath scattered papers, she drifted over. Fen silently offered her the seat he’d pulled out.

  “Thank you,” she breathed as she studied the map.

  Arlen followed her gaze to the thick line running through the landmass, denoting the border between the fae and human realms. He visually traced a line down from the Summer court, through the wall, and down to where he’d found Rina. There was nowhere near there marked on the map, but he knew it all the same. His gaze jumped to their own court nestled in the middle of all the others. Usually it helped them keep an eye on everyone else, but now it made him feel trapped. Their allies, the water and sun courts, held the east coast but they were still too closed in for his own comfort. Especially with Rina’s safety on the line.

  A chair slid out on his right and he glanced over at Ash as she spun it around and plopped into it, folding her arms over the back. Across from them, Farin stacked his papers to the side. “Fire and Dawn have taken Trazar’s side and have promised to aid him in taking Rina from us. Thankfully, Earth, Air, and even Dawn are insisting they wait until the council meeting to confront us. I’m arranging for the palace to be prepared for a siege. For the moment I believe we can stay here, but we’ll likely end up at the palace before this is over.”

  Rubbing his eyes, Arlen wished his brother was here. Rye would have already had ten different strategies thought up for how to protect Rina—more since she was his daughter.

  “How long do you think we have?” Arlen asked.

  “I want everything ready, with Fen and Rina moved to the palace in two weeks. Sealar and Sadoren have already promised to send supplies and warriors there.”

  “How is the shield?” Ash asked.

  “I need an analysis of it, then I’ll work on repairs.”

  “Should we hire someone to put a secondary shield over it until you get time to repair it?” Fen asked.

  Arlen nodded. “He has a point. Unless you’re going to drop a lot of power on one of us, we can’t work on it for you.”

  Lips thinning, Farin’s chin dipped. “I’ll look into our options.”

  “Perhaps we should see about staying with Sealar while the shield is repaired?” Fen asked.

  “We might, if Lord Airin decides to join us. Otherwise we’d be leaving ourselves open to being trapped on the island.”

  Tapping the map over the marker depicting the palace, Arlen said, “If we’re not going to Sealar’s, we should evacuate the civilians from around the city, try to limit the casualties.”

  “I’d like to wait until we know a fight can’t be avoided. I don’t want Earth and Air to take
our cautionary measures as a threat. I’d like to get them on our side, but to do that we’d have to—” He paused, looking at Rina. Shifting in his seat, his eyes then flicked to Dorn, a silent question passing between them.

  “To what?” Rina asked. Her tone, although slightly wary, was also one of calm. Whatever Dorn and her had talked about in the woods had seemed to ground her.

  “Farin,” she said, “while I don’t understand all the circumstances involving the coming war, you have already made it clear that we won’t be safe on our own. So what is it you need me to do?”

  Farin sat back, a smile pulling at the corner of his lips. “We’d have to leverage Trazar’s own tales about you being the royal heir, and we’d have to do it soon. Would you be willing to meet with the lords of the Earth and Air Courts? I believe once they meet you and see that we aren’t keeping you here under duress, they may take our side.”

  Rina gave a slight nod, then cringed from the pain.

  “You need to stop doing that,” Dorn said.

  “Trust me, I know,” Rina said through gritted teeth. She looked Farin in the eye. “If meeting with these two lords will help, then yes, of course I’ll do it.”

  “I should warn you that they’ll likely ask you a lot of questions, some of them uncomfortable to answer.”

  “Like what?”

  “They’ll want to know things like where you’ve been. What happened to your mother and your brother. They may even request that a mind bender verify that you’re telling the truth. Once that’s done, they’re likely to start arguing over who your mate is or should be.”

  Fen fidgeted in his chair. Rina looked at him briefly, but didn’t say anything.

  “I don’t think it would be wise to let a mind bender be involved,” Dorn said from where he’d lingered in the doorway.

  “What is a mind bender?” Rina asked.

  “They can see into your memories, powerful ones could even control and alter your mind,” Fen said.

  “Though they would be required to take an oath to do nothing but view your memories before being allowed to get near you,” Farin said. “It is your right to say no when it comes to things like that.”

  Rina swallowed. “Let me think on it.”

  Nodding, Farin glanced at the stack of papers beside him and sighed. “I believe that’s all for the moment.”

  “Come, Rina,” Dorn said. “Let’s get that book for you.”

  Arlen watched Rina leave with his mate, only to turn back to find Fen fidgeting in his seat.

  “Go,” Farin said, “just don’t be pushy. You’re no use to me if you can’t even sit still.”

  Fen shot his father a glare, but took off after Rina. Watching him go, made Arlen wonder what the boy had up his sleeve.

  29

  Rina

  Quick footsteps came up behind her as Dorn entered their sitting room and he turned just in time to catch Fen flashing her a smile. “I was wondering if maybe you’d like to go for a walk in the garden with me?”

  “Um.” She glanced at where Dorn had disappeared into his room. She wanted her mother’s book—needed it in a way she hadn’t needed something in a long time, yet she wanted to go with Fen too.

  “Perhaps you two could pick us a watermelon while you’re out there,” Dorn said as he came back into the living room. The sight of the book in his hands made her stomach do a little flip. She’d recognize the worn leather cover before he even held it out to her.

  Snatching it up, she held it close as she ran a finger over its edge. It was rough and ragged, the letters on the front beyond recognition, but there it was in her hands. Her eyes burned as she held it a little tighter.

  Fen swayed toward her as he asked, “That was Lyra’s wasn’t it?”

  She nodded, unable to say anything through the emotion clogging her throat. She’d never thought she’d see the book again. For a moment, she felt like she was back in the glade, the dimness of the house, the shade of the trees, the book fresh from its hiding spot.

  Movement snapped her out of it as Dorn handed Fen a thinner leather bound book with a string wrapped around it. “Arlen found it the first time he went looking for Lyra,” Dorn explained. “Perhaps you could sit in the garden and go over basic letters and sentences? Just don’t get watermelon on everything.”

  “I would never,” Fen gasped, then winked at her.

  “What is a watermelon?”

  “It’s a treat. Come on, I think I spotted some that were nearly ripe the other day. You might want to leave that,” he gestured to the book, “in here. I wouldn’t want it to get damaged.”

  “So, a watermelon is a fruit?”

  “Yes, but they grow on vines rather than trees.”

  “All right, you have my attention.” She held the book for a little longer, appreciating its familiarity. She inhaled and thought she caught a hint of her mother’s scent still clinging to its pages, her fae senses sharper than anything she had experienced before. Perhaps it was just her imagination playing tricks on her, but she didn’t care because this was a piece of her mother that she could hold and cherish. She remembered bits of the story, parts where love and compassion had triumphed over evil. Where a woman found love in a lord of shadow and light. Now Rina understood why her mother had loved this book so much, because it reminded her of her family. Not the one she was born into, but the one she chose and made for herself.

  “It’ll still be here when you come back,” Dorn said. “I can put it in your room for you if you like.”

  Swallowing, Rina held it out to her uncle. His expression was soft as he took it, her fingers grazing the cover until it was out of reach. It’d still be there when she learned to read and she would learn, so she could read that book if nothing else. And maybe so she could read the map in Farin’s study, too.

  Following Fen away from that piece of her past felt a bit like slogging through mud. Some small part of her wanted to cling to Fen for support, if only because he seemed to understand in some way. He held the back door open for her, then led her around to the left side of the house.

  They passed a row of fruit trees that had blocked her view of the garden and she stopped dead in her tracks. It was absolutely beautiful with flowers of every color in full bloom and food growing everywhere she turned. And she did not belong there. Tomilin should have been the one here, not her. Never her. She stumbled back a step, her vision narrowing.

  “Rina?” Concern laced Fen’s voice and she tried to make herself turn her gaze, to look at him, but she couldn’t move.

  Her chest heaved as panic crawled up within her. Something slapped into the grass. A hand brushed her cheek, feather light against her skin. Fen stepped in front of her, blocking her view of the garden. “Shhh.” His fingers trailed down the side of her neck and some of the panic eased back. “That’s right, breathe. Let’s sit down.” His hands slid from her face to her shoulders, where he eased her down until her back touched the smooth bark of some type of fruit tree.

  Slowly, breathing became easier and the darkness narrowing her vision ebbed back. Fen crouched in front of her, his hands out as if prepared to catch her. His gaze roved over her and whatever he saw had him plopping back to sit cross legged in front of her. “Want to talk about it?”

  She opened her mouth to say no, then shut it. Slowly, she slid her knees to her chest as she ran her gaze over the flowers and other plants that filled the space. “Tomilin would have loved this place.” Blinking through the burning in her eyes, she swallowed. Now wasn’t the time for this, perhaps it never would be, but she needed to focus on something else. “What do you think of…” She trailed off, not even sure where to start.

  “Everything?” Fen smirked, but the glimmer in his eyes was tempered by concern.

  “Yeah. Everything. Do you—” she cocked her head, trying to come up with the right words. “Do you think it's worth all of this?” Am I worth all of this?

  Fen frowned, his gaze roaming over her face. “Yes. We’ve been wit
hout a ruler for far too long and we need a ruler with a kind heart.”

  “A kind heart only gets you so far,” she muttered.

  “Perhaps, but you’re not just kind.” A hint of pink crept to his cheeks when he said it and she couldn’t help but smile a little. It didn’t last though, not as her thoughts tripped over everything else that needed to be done.

  “What’s wrong?” Fen asked.

  “Nothing. I just—” She ran her fingers through the grass as she gathered her thoughts. “What are the other lords like?”

  Fen’s gaze lit with understanding as he canted his head to the side. “They’re different, but they’re nice enough. Of all the lords, they are the oldest. They’re friends with each other and I’ve seldom seen them disagree with each other.”

  “So to get one, you have to convince them both?”

  Fen tilted his head back and forth, debating, before nodding. “Yeah, I suppose so. I wouldn’t worry about it too much, they’ll do what they feel like whether we want them to or not.”

  Chewing her bottom lip, she nodded.

  “Is it just meeting people in general that bothers you?”

  “Maybe,” she admitted.

  “If it makes you feel any better, it gets easier the more you do it.” He leaned back to grab the book he’d dropped in the grass. “So, how much do you remember?”

  Rina blinked at the sudden change of subject. “Eh. Letters and a few words, I think. It’s been years since I’ve had anything to read.”

  A glimmer of sadness shone in his eyes as he nodded. “Then I’ll write out the alphabet and you can practice writing the letters while I pick us something to snack on.” He untied the leather string around the book and a pencil rolled out. Snatching it up before it could fall in the grass, he spun around to sit shoulder to shoulder with her. She leaned into him as she watched him drag the tip of the pencil across the page, writing letter after letter and naming them as he went. The longer he wrote, the more she realized she didn’t remember them as well as she thought she had. She’d practiced the letters whenever she’d sat still long enough to draw them out in the dirt, but her letterforms had morphed a little over time. She’s always remembered the letters and their order thanks to the tune her mother had hummed as they practiced, but knowing their correct shapes was a different matter.